Archive | March, 2008

OMG SLEEPOVER!!

6 Mar

I’ve been trying to get out of the kiss-and-tell habit, but my interaction with males is too funny not to write about. I couldn’t even make this material up.

So a couple entries ago, I mentioned a boy whom I’d given the acronym YAR. What I didn’t mention was that this boy actually came home with me that night. Now, before you start congratulating me on “getting some”, let me just clear up the fact that when I invited him up, it was not under the pretense of sex. I’ve actually known YAR for a long time, albeit not very well, and it turns out he had a bit of a crush on me when we met. So the night was one of flirting (his goal) but also of catching up (my goal). Anyway, his roommate was supposedly having sex with his girlfriend in their tiny dorm room, so YAR couldn’t go back. Since I was the one who wanted to leave and he was the one who insisted on seeing me home, there wasn’t much I could do except to invite him up. Long story short, he ended up staying for the night because I guess his roommate was having a lot of sex.
Now, picture this. It’s moments after I’ve decided to let him stay the night. He’s all excited because he’s thinking he’s going to get lucky. I’m all excited because — well I’m not really, but it has been a long time since I’ve come even close to cuddling much less anything else, and even I need some lovin’ once in a while. So I change into my lounge clothes (read: Happy Bunny PJs) while he pulls out the sofa-bed. Bright blue pants that say “you suck” just oozes sexiness, right?
First thing he says when he sees me? “Uh…… wow, you look like a six-year-old.” What every girl lives to hear.
What do I do? I bounce happily on the sofa bed and say to him, “Yay, we’re having a sleepover!!!”
I don’t know why I didn’t just whip out some nail polish and a Britney Spears CD (the first album, of course).

Now, for everyone who’s seen How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days, you’d know this is one of the classic mistakes. It is just as bad as naming his member Princess Sofia.

This, ladies and gentlemen, is how I repel men. And this is why I am never going to “get some.”