I thought I was doing better, I really was. I had stopped binge-eating and I was exercising semi-regularly. And then…

YoungandRestless cheated on me.

Not that we were exclusive or anything, but I told him not to make out with anyone on his trip to Florida, and he big fat did it anyway.
And then HardworkingKoreanBoy used me to write a speech for him, then stopped emailing.
And then CuteDanishBoy never got back to me after our one non-date.

So of course I lapsed into sit-around-in-my-PJs-eating-a-tub-of-ice-cream-EVERYDAY mode. It was pretty fucking great.

But now 3 lbs later, I want my old happy, healthy self back. And I don’t know how to get her back. Exams are looming in the not-so-distant future, which means stress and bad skin and even worse eating habits.
Plus, I can’t focus on studying because I’m constantly wondering where I went wrong and why I still don’t have a boyfriend and generally abusing my self-esteem in every way possible.

So my horizon went from 3 boys to 0. And it’s not that I need boys or anything. But my ego could really use some stroking.

If only Ben & Jerry were real people. They’d make fantastic lovers.

Edit: Ok, so there is one more boy on the horizon. LookingforaGirlfriend is kind of old though, and rather on the boring side. Plus, he told me he’s looking for a girlfriend the first time we talked (hence the nickname), so that kind of scared me right off.

Do I have commitment problems? Or am I just afraid to fall in love again?
I want a boyfriend, I do I do I do! But dammit, I am so tired of these games!
I don’t want to fish around to be asked out on a date, I don’t want to wait for a call/email the week after, I don’t want to snoop around on the Facebook of my potential boyfriend/lover/husband, and I don’t want to be the only citizen of Singledom anymore!
I want to wake up feeling on top of the world because I know there’s a boy out there who loves me. I want to go to sleep with a smile on my face because I know he’ll be thinking about me before he falls asleep. I want to have someone to run to when I need cheering up (someone who does not live in my freezer), and I want someone who wants me as much as I want him.

But luckily, I am not thinking about MFL anymore. Well — thinking, yes. Doing anything about it, no. I’ve realized that even if we got back together, everything would be different and I wouldn’t have the things I wanted anyway.

So in the meantime, I’m going to make myself a sign that says “Single and Looking” and fasten it to my head.