The Ghost of Boyfriends Past
11 Jul
They say that time and distance will heal all wounds. But it seems no matter where I go, I cannot escape the ghost of boyfriends past.
Whenever I see roses, I think of the bouquet MFL surprised me with one rainy Sunday afternoon.
Whenever I hear Linkin Park, I think of CJB.
Whenever I see anything orange, I think of HB.
Whenever I see a boy holding an umbrella for a girl, I think of the rain shower GB and I were caught in on our way to dinner. He held the umbrella over me the whole way, even though he was getting rained on.
Whenever I see turtles, I think of the many turtle-themed gifts MFL and I exchanged, and the photos he took in Costa Rica with the turtle plushie in the foreground, representing me being there with him.
Whenever anyone mentions street racing, I think of HF.
Whenever I see a couple splitting an ice cream sundae, I think of DB.
Whenever I see a Chinese buffet, I think of PKB.
Whenever I make egg fried rice, I think of the first meal I ever made for MFL.
It seems the ghost of boyfriends past will always haunt me.
How do reminders of your past relationships manifest themselves in your day-to-day life?
I have weird flashback triggers that I’m not gonna mention. And I know you’re probably sick of HIMYM references from me, but do you remember the episode where Robin tells Ted to get rid of all his stuff because she just sees his gf’s and Ted only sees Robin’s dogs as her ex’s? Lol good times.
I remember that! After that episode, I definitely scanned my room for “stuff from exes” but luckily, I was very good about returning or putting away gifts from exes.
hee hee, loved that episode!
Well, every time I see a Bible, I think of my first serious boyfriend, who dumped me for Jesus, and every time I see a douche bag walking around with a popped collar, gelled hair, and iPhone, I think of my last boyfriend, who was a douche bag who walks around with a popped collar, gelled hair, and iPhone. Fond memories…
Well, that seems to work as an effective repellant for ever hooking up with a douchebag again eh?
Whenever someone mentions The Matrix or Fast & Furious movies, it makes me think of my ex -fiance. He was obsessed with those movies.
C0D4 makes me think of the last failed relationship I was in.
And a whole lot of things make me think of my first love. Too many things to mention, even in my daily life.
I am obsessed with The Matrix!!! So that means there is probably a guy out there who associates The Matrix with me… haha.
What’s C0D4?
MFL was only mentioned 3 times in that list, but to be honest, his ghost is the one that inspired this post. All the other ones I added in there were just a buffer to prove I’m not completely obsessed with memories of my first love.
CoD4 is Call of Duty 4, a first person shooter. :]
To be honest, I have mostly blocked all that out and broken the associations in my mind with past crushes.
Wow really? No accidental reminders?
I wonder what that’s like…
I think it’s because I’ve never been in a loving relationship before. All the crushes I had treated me poorly and a few toyed with my feelings. So basically I tried to cut all that out of my existence since the sad memories outnumbered the fond ones. If I stumble upon something that sort of reminded me, I would just stop thinking about it and go onto something else.
nothing really reminds me of past boyfriends, but the best song EVER is Alanis Morrisette’s ‘Unsent’ an ode to all her past loves. loves it.
Haven’t heard that song but I just looked up the lyrics and – wow! You can bet I’ll be listening to that song when I go home tonight.
I find if you’re together with someone long enough, you make new memories that replace the old ones, so what I remember isn’t its association with past boys but the present.
I think that only works if you’re still dating the dude, not so much if he’s no longer there.
Whenever I see books about Orcs and weird shit, I think about my boyfriend, and I laugh, and think HAHA, STUPID, but then I think about it some more, and I can only cry and be like, oh god, I’m dating a weirdo.
Do you want to qualify “weird shit” or are you going to save yourself the embarrassment?
It’s ok, we all have our own “weird shit,” the whole point is to find someone who loves us for it (or in spite of it), right?
Bittersweet, eh?
Unfortunately, I think the only one I’m bitter about is MFL…
I’m reminded most by the regular places I visit. Sometimes I think it’d be nice to pick up and go somewhere else!
Why don’t you? I think we all need a change of scenery at least once in our lifetimes.
Unfortunately, most of my ‘ghosts’ resonate with their actual physical presence — whether by accidentally seeing them somewhere, them pestering me through e-mail to do them webdesign favours, or seeing someone I know THROUGH them.
Fortunately, my boyfriend now takes me to all the places that I’ve never frequented before, to make new memories :)
Oh, and one more fortunate — the restaurant I used to go with DouchebagChristianButReallyHypocritical Boy got closed and replaced with an Asian restaurant. So all is well there :D
Are you still friends with them? I think this is the wisdom behind the no-communication rule of exes, to protect ourselves from haunting.
But your boyfriend now sounds v. sweet :)
Hmmm, I have a lot of songs that one ex and I used to call “our songs”. Luckily they’re rarely played on the radio.
Other than that, it’s mainly TV shows that hit me – whenever I watch a show by myself that I used to watch with an ex. And it’s hard because I used to have that someone to be like, “oh did you see that? That was hilarious”. and now it’s just me.
Do you have a roommate? Maybe you can start watching TV with your roommate.
Whenever I hear anything by the Muse or Gorillaz, I think of the ex who used me to try and get over his ex-girlfriend.
Whenever I see a Nissan Altima, I think of the ex who went overseas for college, cheated on me whilst there, and then lied about it adamantly before and after breaking up with me via email.
Whenever I think of Warped Tour, I think of the ex who was my first boyfriend and completely insane (such as insisting we would end up married about a month into the relationship).
Yeah. Sadness.
#2 sounds sucky. I mean if you’re already separated by a body of water and breaking up with email, you’d think he’d come clean, eh?
Imagine, if you had married #1 (not probable, but IF), you wouldn’t have had #s 2, 3, 4, etc…
I find I just try to remember the things with a smile of nostalgic value. Except for when I hear Rufus Wainwright it makes me think of an ex and not in a good way. And that sucks cause I love Rufus :(
Great post! I know what you are feelings..but I actually stopped thinking of it as a “haunting” and more of a “greeting”. Whenever I see or hear somemthing that reminds me of an ex, I think of the fun times we had and the happy memories, and they I feel good that I experienced that. I try to let the bad things go, so more good things will happen. But good luck with your ghosts, but you never know they could be as friendly as Casper..lol..