Girl and City

“Did you tell MFL yet?” WAF asked me, soon after I told her about my job offer in Singapore.
“No,” I said immediately. I had scarcely given it any thought. I mean, I hadn’t talked to MFL since we had that conversation about not seeing each other anymore.
“Should I?” I asked as an afterthought. “I mean, I haven’t talked to him or thought about him since our conversation,” I said aloud, more for my benefit than hers.
“Well, that’s good,” she said encouragingly.

“Do you think… Tell me honestly, what do you think about MFL and I?”
WAF paused for a second. “I used to think you two would end up together,” she said quietly.
“End up together? Like, as in, married together?” I asked incredulously.
“Yeah. Like married. But that was when I thought you two would both be in Toronto after university. Now that you’re going to Singapore, that changes everything…”
I sat back in semi-shock. Did all our friends think we would get married someday? How could they harbour these thoughts when MFL and I haven’t been together in nearly four years? How could they harbour these thoughts and still let me cut him out of my life?

It makes me wonder whether I should tell MFL that I’m leaving. It feels weird to break our no-speaking pact just to make an announcement. And what would be the point? To see his reaction? To get him to finally admit, or even realize, that he still has feelings for me?
Even in my own mind, I think it’s absurd to expect anything. He’s MFL. He’s always been passive and complacent. If he didn’t step up when I made it clear I was giving up on him, he’s not going to step up just because I’m moving halfway around the world. And let’s be honest, I’ve enjoyed these past couple months of not thinking about him. In fact, I can honestly say, “I am not in love with him anymore.”
I am not in love with him anymore.

Maybe I will always feel something when I’m around him – or around any guy that treats me like he does, for that matter – but it doesn’t mean that he can make me happy for life. In spite of what a great boyfriend I know him to be, it is now clear to me why he was not enough. He doesn’t go after what he wants. He won’t fight for the girl he loves, nor the relationship they have. And after the break-up, I wanted to believe that he could, that he just needed a wake-up call. Maybe that’s why I waited so long. But not anymore.

No, not anymore.
SG is officially single and looking.

Today I signed my offer with The Consulting Firm and mailed it. I received the offer package a couple days ago but I waited until my parents had a chance to review it before accepting it. Obviously, they were thrilled. I will be making more money than they had ever hoped for, certainly enough to be fully financially independent. In spite of the excessively expensive housing prices in Singapore, I can afford my own place in a condo in the city and still have disposable income to spare. It is a dream come true in every way.
I have only ten months standing between me and the next phase of my life, six of which is to be spent in school. I hope to travel for the other four months – perhaps to Europe with some friends, definitely to China to see my ailing grandmother.

Yesterday, I met WAF in The City for some shopping and dining. Although she was happy to hear my news, she was preoccupied with her own.
“I might be pregnant!” She hissed at me through the racks of a particularly tacky store.
“What?”
“I don’t know, my body has been acting weird lately.” She proceeded to describe to me just exactly how her body was acting “weird.”
“Have you missed your period?” I asked.
“No, I have it in a week.”
“So, it’s not for certain. It could just be your paranoia. Why don’t you take a test?”
“I don’t think I want to know.”
We dropped the subject as we continued shopping. Over dinner, I approached the matter again.
“I don’t know how you could not know. I mean, if you’re not, then you don’t have to worry.”
“But what if I am?”
“Even if you are, it’s not like you don’t have options. It’s not like it would be outside of your control.”
“If I am, should I tell him? But which one should I tell?” She had had unprotected sex with two different men on two consecutive nights a few weeks ago. Believe me, I work very hard at not judging.
“If it doesn’t make a difference to your decision, then I’m not sure you need to. But you may not even have to worry about that if you just take the test.”
She finally agreed that she wanted to know, and she wanted to know while I was there. So near the end of dinner, I slipped out and bought her a pregnancy test and she took it in the bathroom. She was testing a few days earlier than the test recommends, so the results are not necessarily conclusive, but either way, it came out negative.

“Phew,” she said, when she finally came out of the bathroom. She’d have to take the test again closer to her period, but at least for now, she was comforted. We decided we needed to celebrate – my job offer and her non-pregnancy – so we went to a swanky bar on the 51st floor of a building that overlooked the entire city.

“Cheers,” I said, raising my glass.
“What are we toasting to?” she asked.
“To dream jobs.”
“And no babies,” she added.
“Cheers,” and we clinked glasses.
As we sat outside on the wrap-around balcony, sipping champagne, and admiring the city lights, I silently took a snapshot of the view and vowed to remember it. For all my yearnings to get away, I still loved this city. It was beautiful and familiar and welcoming. It was the city I grew up in, the city that taught me about love and heartache and friendship. It was home.

“I’m going to miss this place,” I said, to no one in particular, and raised my glass as a toast to The City before I finished the champagne. Goodbye, Toronto.

Photos and commentary from my trip to New York City (click to enlarge):

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I’m going to Singapore!

Yes, you read that right. Against all odds, and I really mean all odds, I got a job offer! This time next year, I will be working for one of the most prominent financial services consulting companies in the world. Moreover, the Singapore office travels the most, because most of the clients are not in Singapore (it being a city-nation, after all). Travel throughout the Asia-Pacific¹ region is par for the course, and travel to Europe is probable as well.

Ladies and gentlemen, this is the dream job. Well, my dream job.
I thought I would get a good night’s sleep tonight, but I was so excited, I only slept 2.5 hours. Which is why I am writing this entry at 5:19 am².

So, to backtrack. I arrived in New York City at 6pm, after being strip-searched at U.S. Customs³. There turned out to be three of us going to the interview on the same flight, so we decided to take a limo to the hotel. (Ok, we didn’t, but we seriously considered it. After all, the company’s paying for it, and it would have cost the same as the three of us taking separate cabs.) The hotel was gorgeous, as most hotels in Manhattan are, I have come to realize. I had a king-sized bed, two huge mirrors, a flat-screen TV, and all the bells and whistles you can expect at a boutique hotel in Midtown Manhattan. Oh, and the room cost $400 USD a night. I checked their website. Yeah.
My room looked almost identical to the picture on their website:

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1. Hong Kong, China, Taiwan, Thailand, South Korea, Japan, Australia. [↩]
2. I was actually up at 1:30am, but I tried to sleep until 3:45 am, at which point, I gave up. [↩]
3. Ok, not exactly strip-searched. But the customs lady chose me to do a “random search,” which consisted of patting me down thoroughly in front of the entire line, and having my suitcase opened and every pocket checked. [↩]

So I will be heading to New York City this Friday for my second-round interview. The position I’m applying for is actually in Singapore (my second choice was New York), but I didn’t exactly expect them to fly me to Singapore for a one-day interview.

Anyway, I should be preparing for this interview since it’s in financial services consulting and I know nothing about financial services¹, but instead, I am planning my trip down to the minute (are you surprised? When it comes to planning trips, I am like Monica²). But now I need to narrow down the list of things I want to see. I’m already staying one extra day, I can’t extend my stay any longer!

Here is what I have it narrowed down to so far. Keep in mind:

1. My hotel the first night is midtown (which I think is better than Upper East Side anyway) and my hotel the second night³ is near Columbia University (just north of Central Park).
2. I actually enjoy museums, especially art museums. I would not mind spending an entire day inside an art museum.

Saturday morning:
The interview will take all morning and then they will take us out to lunch. I will return to the hotel after lunch to change out of icky business formal clothes before heading out.
Saturday afternoon:
Walk from my hotel to the Empire State Building (10 min) and walk north along Fifth Avenue. The sights along the way include: Macy’s, New York Public Library (just pop in), Saks Fifth Avenue, Rockefeller Center, Saint Patrick’s Cathedral, the Museum of Modern Art (at least one hour), Tiffany’s, Trump Tower, the F.A.O. Schwartz toy store, and the Plaza Hotel.
Saturday evening:
Dinner at one of the following along Fifth Avenue, depending on my mood.
Take the subway downtown and stroll through SoHo.
Go up the Empire State Building just before midnight.
Sunday morning:
A stroll through Columbia’s campus at dawn.
Breakfast at one of the following.
Visit The Met as soon as it opens.
Sunday afternoon:
Lunch in the Upper East Side at VQ Global.
Visit the Guggenheim Museum if there’s time.

I also want to visit the Museum of Modern Art and the American Museum of Natural History. I also want to go shopping in Bloomingdale’s, Loehmann’s, and browse Chelsea, Greenwich Village, East Village, and TriBeCa. I also want to see any number of musicals: West Side Story, Phantom of the Opera, Wicked, Mamma Mia!, or Jersey Boys, but tickets are ridiculously expensive.

I definitely do not have enough time for everything. Huff!

1. Ok, that’s a lie. I do know things about financial services. I just discredit my knowledge because in business school, I’m surrounded by people who know lots more than me. Like, kids who interned at investment banks over the summer, kids who play on the stock market with their OWN MONEY, and kids who are just huge finance nerds because that’s cooler than being nerd nerds. [↩]
2. From Friends. [↩]
3. Because the hotel they booked was completely full and I had to book my own hotel for the extended stay. [↩]