Grievance Letters – Part II
10 Dec
It’s been half a year since I last wrote any grievance letters, but today, I cannot think of a better way to express my grievances.
Dear Mother,
I do not need you to tell me what I look like, that’s what mirrors are for. I do not need you to tell me how much I weigh, that’s what scales are for. I have an eating disorder as it is, so it’s probably not a good idea to tell me I am fat every time you see me. I am in shape. Round is a shape.
Regards,
Your Not Chubby Daughter
—
Dear Professor,
I am not really sure what you want me to write about in this exam since the answers are all pretty much given in the various articles you had us read. I guess I can spend 2000 word giving you a “best of” but shouldn’t you have read these articles before assigning them to us?
Cheers,
A Confused Student
—
Dear PreordainedLoverBoy,
Why have you not texted me in three days? I know you know I’m in The City now, don’t you miss me? Aren’t you going to miss me over the next few weeks? If you don’t contact me, aren’t you afraid that I might give up on you and hook up with someone else over the holidays?
xoxo
Your Preordained Lover Girl
P.S. Feel free to show up at my door with hand-written signs expressing your ardent love for me. My address is…
—
Dear Chocolate,
I love, love, love you. Thank you for being in my life.
Love,
Your Number One Fan
That last one doesn’t count, it’s not a grievance. But seriously, PLB, that’s it? No more texts? We’re just going to go cold turkey for the holidays? That is so anticlimactic.
Aaaarghh i hate zinged out sexual tension. That guy should just text/call already.
Someone’s gotta make PLB stop being all shy and call already! Duuude!
Also, I’m sorry about your mom being like that. It’s never easy when even your own parents start telling you things like that.
Round is NOT a bad shape, either. Guys love curves. And from I remember, you posted a picture of yourself in that one post about the dresses, right? You definitely are not fat at all.
Actually, soon after I posted that, he finally did make more of a move to show me he likes me.
Evidence.
I love these greievence letters! Such a great idea and so funny to read. XD But I have to say boo PLB, what the hell is he doing?
What a fantastic idea for a post! I don’t think you are chocolates #1 fan. Chocolate and I have been married for over 15 years, sorry.