She’s Just Not That Into You
11 Dec
Ever since I saw the movie He’s Just Not That Into You, I’ve felt the need to tell the other side of the story. Not all women are like Gigi. What about the women who blow off the men?
So I have come up with my own list of 10 indicators that she’s just not that into you:
- She screens your calls. Yes, women do it too. You can tell she’s screening if she never picks up when you first call, but then picks up after your fifth or sixth call. You definitely know she’s screening if she finally picks up and says, “What?” (Here’s a handy-dandy How-To guide on screening, not that you should need it.) If she’s screening your calls, she’s not that into you.
- She takes a long time to respond to your text messages, and her texts are one-word replies. Women, on average, use more words in their texts than men. If her texts to you are shorter than yours to her, she’s not that into you.
- She doesn’t initiate anything. If she is never the first one to call you, first one to text you, first one to email you, or first one to suggest meeting, she’s not that into you.
- She won’t introduce you to her friends. For men, they may not want women to meet their parents, but for women, meeting her friends is the symbolic equivalent. A woman’s friends are her greatest allies, they are the girls who tell her she’s a goddess and deserves a man who will worship the ground she stands on, rightly so. A woman will always screen boyfriends past her friends if it’s getting serious. So if it’s been a while and you still haven’t met any of her close friends, she’s not that into you.
- She doesn’t want to spend special occasions with you. Even women who don’t like romance like romantic gestures at the right times. Unfortunately, if she isn’t interested in your Valentine’s Day plans together, she’s not that into you.
- She brings up the idea of casual dating. Even women who aren’t that into you will want to have the relationship talk. Why? Because we’re women and believe it or not, we do like to have things laid out on the table. Women tend to feel guilt more strongly than men when they are seeing multiple people, even if the relationship was not explicitly defined as “exclusive.” Thus, she will probably bring up the idea of casual dating so that she doesn’t feel like she’s cheating. But women are generally monogamous-loving creatures, so if she doesn’t want to take herself off the market, she’s not that into you.
- She doesn’t wear the jewelry you give her. Giving jewelry as a gift is a precursor to the engagement ring in most women’s minds. If she doesn’t wear the jewelry you give her, it’s probably because she doesn’t feel like she’s yours. If she doesn’t want to show the world that there is a man in her life who is buying her nice jewelry, she’s not that into you.
- She always cancels your plans. If someone doesn’t want to see you, in general it should be a pretty clear sign that they’re not into you. But women can be subtle, because they don’t want to hurt your feelings. Instead of flat-out rejecting you, she can come up with all sorts of last-minute excuses to not see you. These may even be legitimate excuses, she may be legitimately busy, but the bottom line is, if she doesn’t make time for you, she’s not that into you.
- She never lets you stay over at her place, you always have to go your place. This one is not set in stone depending on other factors like smelliness, roommates, and location. However, it is generally easier to leave someone’s home than to get someone to leave your home, especially when you want to do it without hurting their feelings. If she’s always looking for an exit strategy, she’s not that into you.
- She refuses to make plans for the future. Not all women are meticulous planners, but on average, they probably plan more in their relationships than men. If she changes the subject every time you want to make plans for the future, be it going on a trip together or getting a pet together, she’s not that into you.
The bottom line is that women and men are more similar than they are different. Regardless of whether we are shy or busy, if we are into you, we would want to see you. Sometimes it’s better to hear the truth sooner rather than later, especially if the truth is: she’s just not that into you.
I think I need to show a friend of mine this list since the girl he is currently “dating” fits all but two of these.
Agreed
Regardless of gender, if they make an effort or seem like they want to be with you, they just don’t want to be with you.
We definately do it too… well I know I do
yep, i’m just not that into you! i don’t like it when guys call at like midnight wanting to talk and im not into them. ughhh
interesting list, useful to read such things from time to time. What about a girl not arguing with you/ not nagging you about anything ? Does that make it to your list. Similarly what about this tendency about girls giving personalized advice “when asked. ” I find it a useful sign on whether a girl cares about you( or maybe out of respect as a friend) if she takes time out to help you ?
Not nagging might just be her personality. On the other hand, it is a good sign if she cares about you. However, if she genuinely cares about you, it’s more likely that she’ll show it by remembering the things you told her as opposed to giving you advice. Advice could be a result of friendship or pity, and not necessarily an indication that she’s into you.
Hahaha YES!!! Love this! It’s time to fight back. ;-)
Bahaha, I totally am doing half these things to the guy I’m currently hanging out with. (2, 3 times a thousand, 4 times a lot, 5, 6, and 10.) It’s half because I’m not that into it, but mostly because I’m petrified of relationship. And I’m not that into because of that petrification, probably. Le sigh, I have problems…
Wow! Great list!
I am like a guy. It’s a lot harder to have that talk and lay it out than to just give these hints that you listed above.